[Whispers]


September 16, 2003 @ 6:53 a.m.
dreams


i just woke up a few minutes ago and took a shower... i had a dream about tristan for the second night in a row. i just want to say, tristan, i am praying for you in every way possible because you once looked at me and said "i will never doubt God again" but yet you are. all the time. i am praying for you because i once loved you more than anyone, but not enough to marry you, as i had thought at one point. but now, i want you and your spirit to go away and leave me alone. i do not want to see you, i do not want to hear you, i do not want to im you, and i do not want you in my dreams. i know that this is something that yo cannot control, but i want to say it. i dont want any part of you ever again. and i mean that. i am happier now with what life and God are giving me then i ever have been in the past. i have a wonderful, loving little baby boy, and i will never give that up because i need him. i want him. i need every insignifigant little freckle on his body. without him, i part of me is missing. i keep telling myself that if he ever decided to walk out of my life, i would be strong, and carry on, but i wont. i will crinkle up and die. i cant live without him. he is now a part of me... he has been a part of me since the day i laid eyes on him. i love him. so, tristan, please stay out of my dreams. please leave me alone. i do not want you back now, or ever.

***Recipe***

This is perfect for those of you that like Bloody Mary's but do not care for alcohol. it may be a bit salty for your taste, but you can give or take some of the salt. i am enjoying one right now. they are very spicy! here goes!

The Perfect Virgin Mary

- 1 1/2 cup of V8 juice (dont forget to shake it!)

- 1 3/4 tbsp of tabasco sauce

- 1/4 tsp salt

***add ice and, if you want to, cilantro***

ENJOY! makes, at most one BIG ASS serving, or two small servings.

*preventry* *nextentry*


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