[Whispers]


November 15, 2003 @ 12:29 a.m.
comparrisons


thanksgiving will never be the same. i hate life, yet again, this time because of bay's mother. good greif is she annoying. i wish i could slap her. instead i called her a few times and pranked her. lol. bay was upset and said it was immature. i know it was, but i was so sick of her and her bull right then, that i didnt give two shits what she thought of me, or anyone else for that matter. i suppose that you'd like to knnow what she did? well, bay and i had plans to spend thanksgiving together, and i was all exited, so i asked for about 3 days off of work so that i could go with him to his mom's, and then she said no. so here i was, stuck with hardly any hours which i desperately NEED because of my financial situation and hardly any bay. so i got pissed and i was like "no way! she has GOT to compromise! this isnt even a joke! i took days off that i NEEDED to get paid for to see him, and i am GOING to see him. whether she likes it or not." so after i practically pitched a fit and acted like his mother, he said that he'd see me for those days. now i feel like shit. he didnt do anything wrong, i just WISH that he would put his foot down with her. she drives me insane. bay and i have been together for 14 months now, and she needs to accept that.

and i realized something! my whole life, i have constanly been compared to people in a negative way:

*i have always been told that i am like my "evil, temperamental, low-life" father.

*i was told by my father that i am exactly like my "lying hateful and munipulating mother." i was told that by my step "mother" and my father.

*i am constantly told by bay's mom that i am just like her daughter's x husband who is a child molesting abusive deadbeat womanizer. how nice.

*i go to work for arbys and i am constantly compared to this girl, jAIme who was [is] a slutty air head slob with an attitude. my name is jAMie, so this is why i am being compared to her; real mature, comparing me to someone simply because our names happen to be the same. nice.

*sigh* it gets tiring after a while. but yet again, i feel as if i have let bay down. i am so upset lately. i have been happy for a while. the other day i wondered how long it would last. well, i guess this is my answer.

*preventry* *nextentry*


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